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The thing is, I went about hooking up with a guy all wrong. I had expectations about what I should feel, still struggled with internalized homophobia, and didn't realize that sexuality is a spectrum.

I think that's why I felt even more confused after hooking up with a guy. Still, I'm glad I did explore, and it did eventually lead me to embracing my sexuality, though it took another five years.

Nevertheless, there were definitely things I could have done to better prepare myself for exploring sexually with other men. Things I learned years after the fact.

Now, with the help of two sexuality experts, I'm going to impart what I wish I knew and had done before and after hooking up with my first guy.

For bicurious men specifically, Lehmiller notes there are plenty of pornos out there which feature bicurious themes. It allows you the opportunity to engage with other men sexually without doing anything IRL.

Grindr and Scruff are two good apps to use. Exploring bi-curiosity isn't just getting out there and doing it with another guy.

This means that we first have to explore how much of our reluctance might be attributed to cultural attitudes and how much of it is solely our responsibility.

One of the biggest ways to reduce internalized shame and to better understand how your sexuality might not be binary or stagnant meaning, specifically, that you're not always exclusively gay or straight is to educate yourself about sexuality.

Alas, sex education leaves quite a few things to be desired here in the United States and abroad, too. Instead of discussing how we come to form our sexual identity, some sex-ed classes never get beyond condoms on cucumbers—or teach abstinence-only curriculum.

There are two books in particular Jor-El tends to recommend to his clients. The first is Brene Brown's Daring Greatly , which tackles shame resilience.

The second is sexologist Dr. When I got to college, I decided I was going to finally explore my same-sex attractions that had been gnawing at me for the past few years.

Without going into too many details you can read about my full experience here , I left that first encounter feeling even more unsure of my sexual identity.

Neither happened. In fact, I came to the conclusion after the experience that I was straight, and it took me another five years of hooking up with men to embrace the fact that I am bisexual.

As always, it can be helpful to explore this in the safe space of therapy. Personally, seeing a therapist was the most helpful thing when it came to exploring and eventually embracing my same-sex attractions.

By the end of my third session, I began calling myself bisexual. There's this notion that if you so much as kiss a man once, you must be gay or bisexual.

There are some bi singles looking for bi couples to have a threesome , bi couples looking for third. What are you looking for?

Bi Curious is one of the largest and most popular bi curious dating sites. There are over 1,, bisexual members on this site now. What's more, it is totally free for bicurious men, bicurious women and bicurious couples.

Although BiCurious. If you have any question or doubts, you can ask customer service for help to keep your membership safe.

Alas, I got so drunk in order to have the courage to hook up with another man that I ended up puking midway through our encounter.

After the experience, I could not tell you if I was gay or bi. Overall, the experience was "meh," like any really sloppy, drunken hookup regardless of gender.

The thing is, I went about hooking up with a guy all wrong. I had expectations about what I should feel, still struggled with internalized homophobia, and didn't realize that sexuality is a spectrum.

I think that's why I felt even more confused after hooking up with a guy. Still, I'm glad I did explore, and it did eventually lead me to embracing my sexuality, though it took another five years.

Nevertheless, there were definitely things I could have done to better prepare myself for exploring sexually with other men.

Things I learned years after the fact. Now, with the help of two sexuality experts, I'm going to impart what I wish I knew and had done before and after hooking up with my first guy.

For bicurious men specifically, Lehmiller notes there are plenty of pornos out there which feature bicurious themes.

It allows you the opportunity to engage with other men sexually without doing anything IRL. Grindr and Scruff are two good apps to use.

Exploring bi-curiosity isn't just getting out there and doing it with another guy. This means that we first have to explore how much of our reluctance might be attributed to cultural attitudes and how much of it is solely our responsibility.

One of the biggest ways to reduce internalized shame and to better understand how your sexuality might not be binary or stagnant meaning, specifically, that you're not always exclusively gay or straight is to educate yourself about sexuality.

Alas, sex education leaves quite a few things to be desired here in the United States and abroad, too.

Instead of discussing how we come to form our sexual identity, some sex-ed classes never get beyond condoms on cucumbers—or teach abstinence-only curriculum.

There are two books in particular Jor-El tends to recommend to his clients. The first is Brene Brown's Daring Greatly , which tackles shame resilience.

The second is sexologist Dr. When I got to college, I decided I was going to finally explore my same-sex attractions that had been gnawing at me for the past few years.

Without going into too many details you can read about my full experience here , I left that first encounter feeling even more unsure of my sexual identity.

Neither happened. In fact, I came to the conclusion after the experience that I was straight, and it took me another five years of hooking up with men to embrace the fact that I am bisexual.

As always, it can be helpful to explore this in the safe space of therapy. Bi Curious is one of the largest and most popular bi curious dating sites.

There are over 1,, bisexual members on this site now. What's more, it is totally free for bicurious men, bicurious women and bicurious couples.

Although BiCurious. If you have any question or doubts, you can ask customer service for help to keep your membership safe.

With large members of this site, bi curious singles have a lot of choice and chances to find their perfect partners.

In addition, There is no advertisement or scammer on Bi Curious.

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